The beautiful loneliness of writing

Chitra Kalyani
7 Min Read

A giant squid might never in its lifetime encounter another of its species. Pondering upon this most solitary of creatures, Sai is taken by melancholy. Yet even in the early pages, this character in Kiran Desai’s Booker-prize-winning novel “The Inheritance of Loss finds redemption in lack. “Love must surely reside.in the lack, not the contentment.

A self-confessed “failed scientist that once studied crickets, Desai herself pursues another love through her solitude. At a lecture at the New Cairo Campus of the American University in Cairo (AUC) entitled “Beautiful to Be Lonely, the author praised the loneliness inherent in the craft of writing.

“The immigrant condition encourages loneliness, said Desai, who left India for Cambridge with her mother at the age of 17, later moving to the US, where she now lives. Solitude prompts writing, said Desai, who started work on her first novel at the age of 22.

Publishing “Hullaballoo at the Guava Orchard was relatively easy, said Desai, but publishers talk more warily about markets after the first novel. The author nevertheless went on to become the youngest woman to win the Man Booker Prize with her second work, “The Inheritance of Loss.

“I feel more and more displaced with each new book, said Desai, “Beauty was in the maturity that came along with writing.

Desai’s mother, established author Anita Desai (also a former AUC guest), equally protective of her isolation, would avoid answering phone calls. The young author told the audience at AUC of her father’s predicament at parties, where he said, “Anita has a headache today . again . always.

With an equal tinge of humor, Desai recounts experiences that further cut her off: her encounter with racism in an England she expected to be apologetic for its colonialism; copies of “Inheritance being burned for an alleged negative portrayal of locals in Kalimpong; being accused of playing up to Oriental sensibilities despite her squabbles with publishers who insisted on putting lotuses or carpets on book covers.

Unlike lone ocean-dwellers, Desai has found the companionship of another author, the Nobel Prize winning Orhan Pamuk. Desai is equally private about her relationship as she confesses she is about her writing. She nevertheless tells Daily News Egypt that “to have the companionship of another writer in the house is enormous luck.

“To know that you are both alone and solitary in work is a great solace, said Desai.

Loneliness amplifies sentiment, according to Desai, and art “deepens experiences of love or loss. Desai quotes Milan Kundera’s unforgettable, “A single metaphor can give birth to love.

Guided by art, said Desai, “we love better, love deeper, fuller of torment. We mimic love quarrels. The author said she herself understood some art better when her father passed away. “I found I wanted the company of music so much; I couldn’t bear the company of anything but music.

Desai’s talk followed readings by AUC students who had won the Madalyn Lamont Prize for writing, whom she encouraged to seek “the companionship of beautiful loneliness.

Yet, isolation comes with its dangers. Among the main characters in “Inheritance is Judge Jemilbhai, deeply ashamed of his brown-skinned, spice-emanating Indian-ness. Even a comment by a white shopkeeper of how her husband buys the same shaving brush strikes him as too forward, too close for comfort.

“His humanity is being undone by a crushing sense of shame, Desai tells Daily News Egypt, “which will then crush his humanity. Desai writes squarely of Jemilbhai’s scorn of “undignified love, Indian love, stinking, unaesthetic love.

Jemilbhai’s ruthless isolation shirks the sentiment that connects people most.

Desai displays a smaller degree of such self-deprecation. “I am always embarrassed at how much food is in my novels. Yet, this is one way that the author who admittedly writes best in the kitchen, presents culture. “In the very small [details], you get a wider communication.

At an earlier talk at AUC’s Downtown Campus on Saturday, Desai talks of the redeeming quality of globalization which provides readers with a basis for identification beyond patriotism or nationality. She recalls conversations between Salman Rushdie and Amartya Sen – one Muslim, one Hindu – who could nevertheless relate to shared problems of baldness.

Literature provides a similar avenue for identification, said Desai. “Reading a book about a Japanese woman may make me feel somewhat Japanese.

Yet in her craft, Desai finds – even seeks – alienation. She identifies with “symptoms of an author dwindling into nervous breakdown, hiding from neighbors or embarking on long, lonely walks, in V. S. Naipaul’s semi-autobiographical “The Enigma of Arrival.

“The costs [of loneliness] are really high, said Desai. The craft of writing is no less challenging. “You have to find your own way.

Desai discards popular workshop-methods that make a trade of the art, lulling writers into false security. Desai finds greater interest in embarking on the unknown, “I’m frightened all the time.

Maxims such as “Don’t write about your dreams, or “Write what you know do not allow yourself to “push yourself dramatically, said Desai. Writing involves having “to come up with your own tools.

Desai quips that she would not recommend her writing process. “I go backwards and create a huge amount of material. Her work on “Inheritance took seven years.

In notebooks, diaries, and other collected writing, Desai searches for echoes. “The story comes out from that mess, a process she compares to searching for a needle in a haystack.

Sitting next to the author with words upon words – books, questions, answers – you too search for a glimpse of steel.

But cherished solitudes not easily pierced, and so far, minds cannot be read.

“No human, Desai noted in the novel, “had ever seen an adult giant squid alive.

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