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The USA in 2033

A satire by Sherif El Alfy on when the Muslim Brotherhood rules the world

By Sherif Al Alfyalfy-pic

Yesterday, on 21 January, 2033 Americans celebrated the inauguration of their 48th president.

However the celebrations seen throughout the country were tame in comparison to those witnessed in the nation’s Islamic states,  particularly in their capital of al-Fustat. This of course, was a result of the jubilation felt by many for the election of the country’s first Arab-Muslim president. Millions of Egyptians, Tunisians and Libyans took to the streets until the early hours of the morning to celebrate what they described as the country’s “grand victory.”

Khairat Shater, Amir of the Believers and High Guide of the Muslim Brotherhood, sent a letter of congratulations to Amir Mohamed Morsy and to Egypt, congratulating him on the victory of his son, Osama Mohamed Morsy, in the latest American presidential elections. He stated that he hoped this victory would usher in a new era of prosperity for Islam throughout the country.

Governor Mohamed Morsy also sent a letter of congratulation to his son, reminding him not to forget his religion or his roots, and not let his newfound power go to his head. He further instructed his son to walk in the path of God and guide his flock to the best of his ability.

He then instructed his son to move quickly to right the social and economic wrongs of the United States, which neither God nor the prophet would approve of. He added that it was necessary to spread the word of Islam amongst the people, and for them to unite under its purview, and that God will give strength to those who seek him.

Saad Shater, the Ministry Amir, decided to grant all state workers and employees of Islamic institutions a three day paid vacation to celebrate the inauguration of America’s new president. Shater sent a letter of congratulation to both President Morsy and his father, and ordered that the American flag be raised to fly next to that of Egypt and the Federation of Islamic states in front of the Presidential Palace.

Mohamed ElBaradei, detained Shaykh of Egypt’s opposition both at home and abroad, called for an Egyptian-American Salvation Front to be created to challenge the Muslim Brotherhood’s monopoly on power. He added that the prophecy made by the now deceased Hamdeen Sabahy, Baradei’s former cell mate and brother in arms, had come true. He also claimed that the predictions made in Egypt’s last ever film, produced by Khalid Yousef in 2018, which indirectly pointed to the spread of the Muslim Brotherhood’s influence all over the world, had also come to fruition.

The new American President then gave his first ever speech in front of the American people, beginning with the passage from the Quran which states: “We have embarked upon a grand victory.” Throughout the nation the speech was met with both disapproval and support, with those conservative elements in the audience letting loose a mantra of booing.

The president’s Arab and Muslim supporters however, were quick to evict those booing from the premises. The president then went on to speak off hand and began improvising, asking his opponents to respect the results of the election, which saw him legitimately rise to the position of America’s 48th president.

The new president then assured the American people that his number one priority would be to address the country’s economic woes, and that he was currently in the process of negotiating a deal with a Qatari company to buy the now bankrupt Ford and General Motors car companies. He then went on to speak about the need to increase the nation’s budget and inject liquidity into the economy in order to address the country’s economic recession.

Sherif Al Alfy is managing editor of 7 Ayam magazine

This article was originally published in 7Ayam magazine

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