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Fools’ Culture: The Orion correlation theory confirmed

The long hidden truth about Giza’s pyramids is finally coming out

The pyramids seen from the perspective of the Orion constellation
The pyramids seen from the perspective of the Orion constellation

The long unconfirmed theory of the pyramids being built in line with Orion’s Belt has been confirmed by the Ministry of Antiquities. The theory states that the three Giza pyramids have been built to align with the three bright stars of Orion’s belt: Alnitak, Alnilam, and Mintaka. The Orion correlation theory has been contested for years although the theory does explain why the third, and smallest, is slightly away from the other two.

It is said that Ancient Egyptians have tied Orion with the god Osiris, who is the god of rebirth and afterlife, or in other words “the origin”. The confirmation of the theory comes after years of extensive research and secretive digs around the Giza Pyramids area. The German expedition, along with the Ministry, have been contacting various historians and consulting astronomy specialists to work out the body of the research. An excerpt of the extensive paper “The Confirmation of the Giza Pyramids’ Orion Correlation” will be published next month in National Geographic. The issue is supposed to reveal all the details of the research and the people involved, which remains undisclosed.

The paper also postulates several theories regarding the reason for lining up the pyramids with Orion’s Belt. One theory is that the Pharaohs believed that the alignment will guide them to the afterlife, or the heavens, where Osiris lies.

Some zealous conspiracy theorists have claimed that world governments have kept the confirmation of the theory a secret because it also points at the existence of aliens. Some scientists have claimed that ancient Egyptians were pointing to where they came from. Conspiracy theorists and extra-terrestrial life enthusiasts believe that the confirmation of the theory will bring them one step closer to the truth “out there”.

It is important to mention that the Orion constellation is the brightest and most recognised constellation in the world. It has affected many cultures around the world and is one of the main navigation constellations used by sailors. It is also the one constellation that is viewable all over the world, as it lies on the celestial equator. The prime location of the constellation suggests that there might be more to it than just a navigation aid.

The closest star of Orion’s belt is Alnitak, which is 800 light years from Earth. It is also believed to be 100,000 times brighter than our galaxy’s sun.

Critics of the theory say that the theory only works if the pyramids are inverted, which explains the multiple digs found around the three pyramids. Although nothing has been announced yet, the search continues, as rumours of three inverted pyramids underneath the Giza ones surface.

Additional reporting by our April Fools’ team

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